Conning it up: Tips and tricks for an awesome con time!

I just returned from rocking my butt off at ConNooga this weekend with some of the most amazing friends a girl could hope for. Seriously, my convention family is incredible and I adore every single one of you.

Cons, for me, are a ton of fun and just about the most exhausting thing in the world. When you spend most of your time alone or with just a few people being in a situation where you're suddenly surrounded by thousands of people can be overwhelming. Especially when you're on and working the whole weekend.

Yes, at conventions I'm working, connecting with readers, writers, publishers, and friends. From the moment I get there until the moment I go back home, I'm on and working. What that means is smiling, answering questions, and interacting with people. As an introvert with some serious anxiety issues, it can be incredibly difficult.

Over the years I've gotten better. I no longer hide in my room between panels, or eat alone, or go to bed as soon as my last panel is over. I talk to strangers, don't let one jerk ruin the weekend, and I stay out and interact with people (which includes occasionally uncomfortable, creepy situations). I also have fewer moments of 'Oh god why am I here with all these incredibly talented people when I am a potato'  which helps as well. I figured that now was as good a time as any to share a couple of things I've learned over the years and see if maybe it can help anyone else have a better time.

1. Have a comfort group

Have a person (or a few people) that you can go to when you get overwhelmed and that calm you down. This can be a friend, a mentor, etc. It's great when you have a table near this person, but that doesn't always happen. I'm fortunate to have built up a great network of people that make me feel safe and I can go to them when I get frazzled and get my head right again. I also have a great group of people who remind me that I have a right to be here and that my point of view is valuable.

2. Take some time before your panel

Panels scare the ever-loving daylight out of me. The thought of something stupid coming out of my mouth gives me nightmares weeks before I even get to a convention. But they're also one of my favorite things because I love helping people. So, before most panels I try to find a chance to escape to the bathroom and do the wonder woman pose in a stall for a few seconds. There's an awesome Ted Talk that explains more about this, but it helps me feel more confident. I also try to make a conscious effort to not cross my arms or slouch. If I project confidence long enough, I start to feel confident again. I often stand with my hands on my hips behind my table or twirl from side to side to work off my anxious energy. It makes people laugh, but it helps me feel better.

3. Study the convention before you go

Knowing who is going to be there and where it's going to be can help immensely. Learning that a convention is at a hotel you've been to before makes it less frightening (especially for me because I have zero sense of direction and get lost in my own neighborhood frequently). Make a list of addresses you need to know (hotel, convention center, gas station, restaurant, etc.) and keep them in your pocket or purse.

Also, don't be afraid to reach out to people who are going to the same convention. This is especially true if you're a guest and don't know anyone. Email some of the other guests, introduce yourself, and make plans to meet up there! For me, talking to someone on social media first is awesome and way less frightening than talking to a stranger in person.

4. Know when you need a moment

Going to hide in the bathroom or your room when you get overwhelmed is okay! The point is to come back out and get at it again as soon as you can. Take a few deep breaths, and try to calm down. Try listening to your favorite song, reading something you love, or just going on a walk. It's okay to freak out, but the point is to not let it conquer you.

5. Don't let one thing ruin your weekend

At some conventions I have unfortunate encounters with creepers who make it difficult to enjoy anything after it's happened. What I've found works for me is to take a walk with a friend, get out of the area, go get food (or drinks or nothing). The movement helps calm me back down and reminding myself that awesome people way outnumber the creeps helps me remember why I'm here and that at the end of the day I love conventions and the wacky, awesome family I've found in them.

6. Play pretend

Sometimes when I go to conventions I pretend I'm someone else. I pretend to be a really outgoing, boisterous, confident person. I wear outrageous clothes, talk loud and play pretend like when I was a kid and would pretend to be a power ranger. By the end of the weekend, I'm ready to take that persona off, but it can get me through the convention. I have a particular skirt, and a particular pair of shoes that 'transform' me into this persona and when I'm really worried about shrinking away at a convention I'll wear those and fake it till I make it in the confidence field.

7. Remember everyone else is nervous too

Almost every person you meet at a convention is nervous about it. I've even had someone nervous about talking to me (to me!!) and it's strange to suddenly realize that no one is perfect and always confident. This weekend I heard a New York Times bestselling author say that they felt like at any moment someone was going to realize a mistake had been made and come take everything from them. That's a feeling I fight through every day, and realizing even the people you admire fight that battle is incredibly comforting.

You're not alone with your fear, we're all wrestling with it too.

I hope maybe that helps someone else, and if you have any tips or ideas I'd love to hear them!

Done is better than perfect

So the incredible Chuck Wendig recently wrote a blog post about The Days When You Don't Feel Like Writing and, as usual, hit the nail straight on the head and sent it spiraling into another dimension of baddassery and amazingness.

Writing every day, especially on the days when you don't feel up for it, has changed how I get work done. The days when every word is like trying to pull teeth from a live, hungry great white are the ones that matter the most. If you can write on those days, you can write anytime, anywhere. And you start to believe that. That's power right there.

I use to make excuses for why I didn't get any words on paper, but that just it made it easier to continue to skip days of writing because I 'didn't feel like it' and just didn't want to.

What I've realized is that when I come back to edit my work I don't usually notice what was written on the days when I was pulling teeth and the days I was really feeling it. They all need editing, reworking and pulling together to become cohesive. Nothing shows up perfect.

It's actually one of the new things I've started telling myself "done is better than perfect" because you can't edit a draft that doesn't exist yet, you can't publish a book that was never written.

So write whether you're feeling it or not. Write when you have the time, whether you want to write or not, because at the end of he the day no one is going to pinpoint the moment you struggled in your writing of the first draft.

Get it done, and then worry about everything else.

Valentine for Writers

The image of the writer locked away in a dark room pounding away on the keyboard is one that's always been imbedded in my head. And for a good reason, I mean, writing doesn't get done except by some solitary confinement with a writing implement of some sort.

Today is Valentine's Day and, for a lot of people, that means spending the day with their loved one(s) (or alternatively complaining about a lack of loved one(s)). Today in particular reminds me that writing isn't just a solitary effort. Yes, the act of writing generally happens alone, but writers don't have to be alone. 

I think that love and support is one of the most important things that a writer can find. Having a supportive group who helps on the days when you don't want to type another word, or who tells you  that million dollar story idea you had about a bear who finds love with a hunter might not be such a good plan.

Writers need that.

That's one of the reasons I love living in this age of digital connection. I'm very lucky to have a very supportive family, and a great group of friends who support me, and believe in me. But I find people online all the time who don't have that, and who are reaching out into the webs of interspace to find it, hoping someone will reach back.

Maybe it's in the #amwriting tag on twitter. Maybe it's on a forum board. Maybe it's through putting up fan fiction. Maybe it's through Nanowrimo.

But finding that is a vital and important part of writing. Writing is lonely, and it's hard. Ripping up pieces of your heart and spreading them on a page in a finger painting you hope someone else will understand can make a person a wee bit off after some time, and sometimes it's easy to lose your way and wander through this writing world lost and confused.

That's where a loving, firm hand is great to have to help pull you up and whisper, 'You can do it.'

So happy Valentine's Day to everyone out there and an especially big hug to everyone I'm blessed to call friend!

Paper thin Steel

Getting a bad review sucks.

No matter what it always sucks, but it also comes with the territory of being a writer. You put your work out there for others to have at and sometimes you get hit where it hurts.

I've started to look at writing as an almost physical thing. You carve off a piece of your skin and blood and craft it into something with its own legs. Other people help shape it too, editors, beta readers, publishers, etc. all work to turn this ball of your flesh into something that can live outside of your body.

And then you give it a kiss on the forehead (or a swift kick in the butt) and send it into the world. You help guide it, try to get it into the right hands, and hope that it won't wander down any dark alleys, but sometimes you watch your little crafted piece of skin get filleted and left for dead in the gutter.

And then you start the process again with a new hunk of flesh.

I've always been fascinated (and struggled) with that line between being confident enough to not let sharp comments cut too deeply, but still able to listen to sometimes painful criticism.

Spending almost 5 years in creative writing programs in various colleges definitely has helped me build up a thicker skin than I had when I was 15 and finished writing my first serious attempt at a novel and threw it away when a friend was harsh on it.

But there are still days when those reviews dig deep and twist little barbs into my skin. And there are other days where I put my nose in the air and think that no one could possibly critique my work (those are far less frequent though).

I'm still trying to find that line between paper thin where everything cuts deeply and being steel where nothing gets through (save from things with serious and explosive force).

How do you handle it?

2014: One Thing At A Time

I love making resolutions for the new year.

Anyone who has ever been to a New Year's Eve party with me knows that I take my time to put my resolutions on pretty scrapbook paper, carefully chosen and decorated. I then hang that paper somewhere in my room where I will see it every day for the next year.

I also have a bad habit of making somewhat unrealistic resolutions, like the year I resolved to write a best selling novel and make a million dollars...in that single year. But this year I've done really well with my goals and kept them at a realistic level. I'm not going to share all of my resolutions, but I have made a goal that I want to talk about because it's the one I'm most excited about.

This year I have resolved to do things one at a time.

It sounds so simple, but it's something I really struggle with. In the past, while writing a blog post I would  have a youtube video going, and probably be chatting with a friend or two, and maybe reading a book or playing a game too.

I would watch movies with my phone in my hand, and read books while trying to play a game. I would never really stop to 100% focus on the one task I was trying to accomplish, so I ended up with a lot of confused, half-finished projects that I never quite knew where to pick up.

So this year I've resolved to do things one at a time. So while I'm writing this blog post, that's all I'm doing. There's no video playing in the background; I'm not trying to cook dinner at the same time. I am sitting here giving my entire attention to the task at hand.

So far, it's gone wonderfully, and I really can see a difference in a lot of what I do. I've accomplished more, and kept better organized. I see a project, start it, and finish it. BAM.

Now, I know there are projects that cannot be finished in a single sitting, and that's fine too. I devote a certain amount of time to them, and when that time is up I can work on other things. For instance, I'll write on the next novella of the Bone Queen series for twenty minutes to an hour, and then I'll work on something else, but during that project time, that's all I do.

It's strange to think that actually stopping to just focus on one thing is a resolution I would make, but lately I've noticed how badly multi-tasking has served me. I get a little bit of work done on a lot of different projects but can never cross anything off my list. What good is that? Just a whole lot of spinning in place and going nowhere.  So this year I resolve to forget multi-tasking and go back to focusing on a single project at a time!

What kind of resolutions are you making for this year (if any) and how's it going keeping them so far?

Nanowrimo Lessons

So Nanowrimo has officially been over for over a week. To everyone who reached 50,000 words, well done! To everyone who made an effort and wrote their heart out, awesome job! 

To me Nanowrimo has never been about the finish line. It's never about getting 50k in a month: it's about remembering that I can write every day and that there is a supportive community of writers out there.

So, to everyone who wrote for Nanowrimo, I hope you're still writing every day. I hope you remember the excitement of it, the thrill of coming up with something new to say every day, and that you remember the days you didn't want to write a thing but that you still put fingers to keyboard (or pen to paper or ya know... whatever you do to write!).

Remembering the times you wrote when you didn't want to, when you were tired or uninspired, are what is the most important thing to take from Nanowrimo. Writing isn't easy; it isn't a simple, easy task. It requires giving up time from other areas of your life, and putting it into stories, and words that you believe in day after day.

For me, Nanowrimo is about remembering that writing is work, not about sitting and waiting for the perfect time to write. If you don't make the time, you're never going to just find it hiding under the couch.

…unless of course you live above a time temporal anomaly and that sort of things hides under your couch. 

Back to my roots in Milledgeville

This weekend I will be a guest at the Georgia Literary Festival taking place in Milledgeville, Ga. This is my first year as a guest, and, for me, what makes this honor even more special is the fact that I received my bachelor's degree from Georgia College in Milledgeville. It's also the first place I was published (in the Georgia College Literary Magazine, The Peacock's Feet.

So Milledgeville is near and dear to my heart and I'm very excited about returning.

So, where will I be?

Friday

Somewhere between 5-7: The Georgia College reception in the Dunahoo Lounge on campus (next to the Chic-Fil-A).

Saturday

12:oopm: Rise of the New Pulp in the Georgia College Library Information Technology Center.

4:00pm: Georgia (and Murder) On My Mind in the Old Governor’s Mansion Education Room.

Between those, I'll be in vendor area wandering from table to table. My awesome friends, and fellow writers Bobby Nash, Sean Taylor, Van Allen Plexico and Barry Reese (who also deserves a huge thanks for all the work he's put in the festival and making it awesome!).

I will be selling my books and am happy to sign anything, so just come say hello!

Tears and Book Releases

Today my first stand alone work debuted on Amazon (which you can buy here).

It's been an incredible trip to get here, and I have a confession to make.

Today, after getting home from work, and just staring at a book cover with my name on it, I  burst into loud, ugly sobbing for about thirty minutes.

Because a year ago, I didn't think I'd ever be here.

I wrote the Bone Queen while I was in my second to last semester of grad school, and I was ready to give up writing. I hated the first draft of the Bone Queen. Hated it. I was ashamed of what I'd written.

I lost all faith in myself as a writer, and resigned myself to never writing again.

And for about six months after that, I didn't write. I was at a point of exhaustion I didn't think could exist. I was past just running on fumes; I ran on nothing but spite, hate, and caffeine. Graduate school really did nearly kill me and every creative bone in my body.

It wasn't until I had turned in my thesis that I even really gave writing a try again, and I was shocked at how much just writing again helped me feel like me again. It helped me be not so exhausted, not so depressed, and anxious.

It was like falling in love with words all over again.

The Bone Queen's revisions all happened during that slow return back to words. The first few revision drafts were painful and awkward like trying to crawl through a mine field with your arms and legs bound behind your back. But by the time the third draft was taking shape, I felt confident in my own fingers again.

I found my footing, and The Bone Queen's story found its heart.

Seeing it in print, knowing that everything had paid off in the end just sent me into tears of relief, and joy at knowing that I did it, that I was much stronger and way more dedicated than I ever gave myself credit for. (and waaaaay more dedicated to writing than to say... getting up early to exercise. hahahaha)

So, here's a little bit of encouragement and hope out there for anyone whose struggling with writing, who can't see the end of the road. It's out there, and you can get there even if you have to crawl through the mud, and drag your exhausted body across coals.

I know a lot of people are starting Nanowrimo right now, so just buckled down and crawl through the fire.

You can do it.

Special Announcement! My debut digest novel announced!

Hi all!

Sorry the blog has been in disrepair lately, I've been hacking and editing up something I'm very excited to share. My first debut stand alone work will be available soon! Now, while I go scream and dance and flail with joy: here is the official press release.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

BREAKOUT CHARACTER FROM PRO SE COLLECTION RISES SOON IN HER OWN DIGEST NOVEL- THE BONE QUEEN BY ANDREA JUDY

In 2011, Pro Se Productions, now a leading publisher of New Pulp and Genre Fiction, debuted a new character initially as a live spokesmodel to promote both the company and New Pulp in general-The Pulptress. Proving popular in the New Pulp Community, the Pulptress appeared in her own volume of adventures by various writers in 2012. One story and one character besides The Pulptress within that volume in particular captured the minds, tongues, and hearts of fans so completely that she now comes to life in her own digest novel.

Pro Se Productions proudly announces the upcoming release of THE BONE QUEEN, a digest novel by Andrea Judy. Judy, a contributor to the original THE ADVENTURES OF THE PULPTRESS collection, titled that short story ‘The Bone Queen’, but the new book is something more. It is that most hallowed of stories-The Bone Queen’s origin.

The Bone Queen-Strangely exotic, absolutely disturbing. A woman who, although hauntingly beautiful in some respects, is also horrifying, much of her upper torso missing and bone exposed. A Practitioner of Death itself, able to bring the Undead to Unholy Life by consuming their bones, The Bone Queen stands as a formidable archenemy to The Pulptress. But who was she before Fate ripped away her flesh and committed to her a most terrible, awesome destiny? Andrea Judy takes readers back to the beginning for this enigmatic character in THE BONE QUEEN.

I’ve always loved the villains in a story,” says Judy, “so I was thrilled to have the chance to tell a story from a darker point of view, showing the reader where a villain came from. It was a struggle at times to write, to remember that this wasn't a story about light overcoming the dark, but about embracing that darkness. I’ve had an amazing time working with Pro Se getting this book together, and I’m thrilled to share it with the world!”

THE BONE QUEEN is the first of two digest novels set in the Pulptress’ world that Judy will write. The second, due out in 2014, will focus on the second meeting of Judy’s villainess and the Pulptress, a follow up to the initial short story.

THE BONE QUEEN, featuring an absolutely gorgeous cover by Ariane Soares, an artist with Fitztown, is tentatively scheduled for release in November 2013.

Andrea Judy is a writer, student, and professional pixie. She makes her home in Atlanta, Georgia She enjoys causing mischief by talking non-stop about Internet memes and all of the stories she’s working on. She has had poems and short stories appear in various literary magazines. She is returning to her roots in genre fiction and is happy to have her first novella published with Pro Se Productions.

For more information or to interview the Author, please contact Pro Se Productions’ Director of Corporate Operations, Morgan Minor, at MorganMinorProSe@yahoo.com

For more information on Pro Se Productions, go to www.prose-press.com and like Pro Se On Facebook at www.facebook.com/ProSeProductions to keep up with future releases concerning THE BONE QUEEN and other Pro Se works.